Full Circle Moments

I’m going to be honest, I kind of fell into the profession of nursing. It wasn’t something I knew I was going to be or even thought I would be good at. My mom was not a nurse and really no one in my family was in the medical field, except my grandma. I liked Science and gravitated towards anatomy. I knew I did not want to be a doctor (I still know that 😂), I contemplated for a hot second about being a Dentist but then realized I hated going to the Dentist myself, and I hated people’s gross mouths, so that was quickly ruled out. So by May of my Senior year of High School I landed on Nursing, and as luck would have it, I had been accepted at the University of Iowa a few months prior. Score! 😉

I wasn’t a “Hawkeye” growing up, so that was not really a draw. In fact we were “Cyclone” fans (state school rivalries - IYKYK), but I applied to all the state schools and luckily was accepted to all them (that would not be the case today), so I had the privilege of choosing where I wanted to go. The University of Iowa had an excellent Nursing school, annnd it happened to have a reputation as a “fun” school, (notice how I did not say party school? 😎) and you can just never go wrong with a Big 10 education. There was just one problem, I had to get accepted into the Nursing program. I definitely had too much fun my first semester and actually ended up getting declined the first time I applied to the College of Nursing. I was devastated. And many people advised me to transfer and give up on graduating from Iowa and even consider a different major. I weighed all my options and knew I could turn my grades around (crazy what happens when you go to class and study 🤓) if I buckled down and got to work. 4 1/2 years in total in IC.IA (best college town, evaaaaa), I walked across the stage and received a Bachelor of Science in Nursing from the University of Iowa. We threw one hell of a party, I passed my boards about a month later, took the first job that was offered to me, and away I went.

Those first few years as a nurse I was drinking from a fire hose. Learning as much as I could, as fast as I could and never really gave it much thought the impact I was having on patients and their families. I actually did not have the mental capacity to think about that at the time - I had too much to learn. Some families I would connect with more and others not so much. That felt normal. I do remember crying though when I lost my first patient, which made me realize I was not the Tin Man and still had a soft heart. I actually think it was those real and raw moments/connections that kept me going those first few years.

Eventually, I made my way out to Denver, CO where I landed a job in the Cardiac ICU at Children’s Hospital Colorado. It was there that I really realized the impact I was making as a bedside nurse while working crazy hours, holidays, weekends and everything in between. I worked for a surgeon at the time that demanded excellence and told me his outcomes were directly related to my care and my knowledge for the patient. This guy was nice, but I wasn’t about to get on his bad side. So I asked questions, found nurses I wanted to be like (hi Suze!) and modeled them, I went on a couple mission trips to Nicaragua where you have zero resources and very little at your disposal (more on that later, but I learned a TON), and eventually found my footing. I loved that job and I loved the patients/families I took care of.

Why am I telling you this? Well for one, graduation season is right around the corner and this time of year always has me thinking about my story and how I got to where I am today. And the other reason, the real reason, is because I recently delivered a cookie order to a woman across town from me that recognized me upon her door opening (I will be honest, I did not recognize her) and she was trying to place me. We quickly realized we had a mutual friend, but she and I had never hung out in the same circle. I mentioned I worked with our mutual friend at Children’s Hospital many years ago and she’s my unofficial Sweeties Hype girl (hi Jilayne!). She then asked what unit I worked on, and at this point I was like everyone knows of someone that works at Children’s Hospital, because it’s such a huge place. But I told her I worked in the Cardiac ICU which was housed in the same department our friend Jilayne worked in. And then in an instant, she was like you took care of my son. I know you were his nurse the night he coded and you saved his life. I instantly had goose bumps. And to be clear, I did not save her baby alone - it was an incredible team effort. But I was assigned to him/he was my patient, and I do have a photographic memory and I was immediately transported back to that night in the Summer of 2011. I remembered what bed he was in, who else was on with me, including our charge nurse and the surgeon that came flying through the doors in the middle of the night in flip flops, and if I am honest, I also remember thinking there was no way that baby was going to survive. Not very kind of me, huh?

But guess what? TWELVE years later, that sweet little baby is alive and well. He’s skiing, he’s going to school, he’s a big brother x2 and more than anything in the entire world, his mom (now my friend and customer) got her wish - she got time with her son, she’s made memories and they have had a life together. And the best part is, that time is not over - they have meany years left with one another. She cried, I cried and I have thought about our interaction every day since. That little guy was meant to live and I firmly believe his mother, and a little help from God, allowed for a miracle to happen.

SO, whenever you’re in doubt and wondering where your life is going or you feel like you’re floating and bouncing between clouds 🙋🏻‍♀️ sometimes, just remember you may not know the reason or feel the justification until life really comes full circle. I have not always loved nursing, healthcare has been a real struggle the last 3 years for all the obvious reasons, and sometimes I think I have no business making cookies for people, but that moment on that front step delivering a 1/2 dozen baked cookies, really grounded and reminded me that we can all make an incredible impact when we do a job well and get out of our own way. And never would I have thought that a moment in my nursing career 12 years ago, would have collided with my passion project today. It was a “full circle” moment for sure, and it made me think it was the universe saying, “just keep going!” And let it be a reminder to you too - when in doubt, “JUST KEEP GOING!” 😍

Sending you all lots of love this Spring.
xo. AFK

P.S. I will do you a favor and spare you the time and save my grad school story for another day - that’s not nearly as heart warming.